Today I met the following people and things at the grocery store. I have given the people names. Since they were all too busy for an interview I have taken the liberty of constructing dating profiles for them. 'Toine, the early middle-aged gay black man
Oooo, wanna swap a “Velma” for a “Kath”? She’s a Tucson based former Bay Area hippie. She wears loose cargo capri pants and Teva sandals. She drives a cerulean Toyota Matrix (what a fun color!) and shops at Sprouts. Her cart is filled with Sprouts brand Oreos knockoffs and bakery items but it comes from a “health food store” so calories don’t count. She will also berate the poor cashier about what the mailer said the price for said Oreos should be, even though she’s a week too late. She is much too evolved for hygiene and always smells a bit musty. She takes a weekly tai chi class through a city program in the park.
You left out a man named JOSH. Likes: podcasting, cold weather, Maybelline mascara, honesty, talking about Cluster B. Dislikes: hypocrites, mean people, vegans, his mother.
I am out taking a walk on the same path where you, Adam, and I walked a couple of months ago. I just scared the hell out of a lizard laughing. 😆 😆😆
TGIF, Josh,
I see you’re full of piss & vinegar today. 😉 😀
😂👍🏻
Easy Solution........MOVE!
you live a sheltered life haha
Oooo, wanna swap a “Velma” for a “Kath”? She’s a Tucson based former Bay Area hippie. She wears loose cargo capri pants and Teva sandals. She drives a cerulean Toyota Matrix (what a fun color!) and shops at Sprouts. Her cart is filled with Sprouts brand Oreos knockoffs and bakery items but it comes from a “health food store” so calories don’t count. She will also berate the poor cashier about what the mailer said the price for said Oreos should be, even though she’s a week too late. She is much too evolved for hygiene and always smells a bit musty. She takes a weekly tai chi class through a city program in the park.
Having listened as a freeloader for quite some time, I had to pay after this post, which is the funniest thing I’ve read in the 2020s.
😂😂😂❤️
You left out a man named JOSH. Likes: podcasting, cold weather, Maybelline mascara, honesty, talking about Cluster B. Dislikes: hypocrites, mean people, vegans, his mother.