I went to college in the 90’s and was indoctrinated with all the garbage we are dealing with now. It was a thing then, wasn’t useful then and I agree with you, it all needs to go now. Not just less extreme, but gone. It didn’t work. Once I saw it at the extreme level, I learned just like you that all of it is garbage. I wish all of it would go away. Maybe someday.
The reason it doesn't work is because it's being forced upon people. I wrote about that a bit in another comment. The only way to get people to love you is to just be a kind person and not force things upon others. These people, with these month-long celebrations are into forcing hearing about this (and seeing it everywhere, like Amazon's recommended reading/watching lists), and forcing things upon resistant people just makes them hate you. It's the total opposite of what the intention supposedly was for these special time periods. It was never going to work.
The flags arrayed all over public spaces have the air of a conquering army planting its standard on newly won territory, and you know what? That's why they adopted flags: to claim territory. To let us know we'd been conquered.
You had me at: "Scads of women are worried that they won’t have the “misogyny” excuse anymore for just about everything from their job disappointments to men talking back and telling them they’re being too selfish and emotional, for example."
I have to admit I'm encouraging men as best as I can to not take this anymore, or push back if they're afraid to. That said you might imagine I know many men who could push back but don't either because they don't want to deal with it or because they are afraid of reputation damage. I get it. But it does become exhausting to stand alone. I see what you see as the default ideology among women, and idk why people are saying wokeism is in the dustbin. If anything, this zombie ideology has been turbocharged because of trump. And this is one of the very few places that I will admit that I wanted Trump to win because I want eros to recede somewhat from the public sphere, or at least stop dominating it. But, I also didn't want it because I knew people around me would be hysterical.
This also reminded me of Harrington's book. She makes a compelling argument against progress and definitely has me convinced. I never thought I'd say that.
Progressives confused "progress" with the directed abolishment of all normativity. I read MH but I think she mislabelled the term "reactionary" feminism. Its not reactionary - its just returning to base socio-psychological norms of men & women coupling up in pairs for life to reproduce. Something so deeply ingrained into the species that all it took was one generation breaking away from this to potentially derail Western culture.
Of course the left will double down! We already know that's how they operate. But it will be enjoyable watching their tantrums.
I feel the same. I go on FB and people I've been friends with for 40 years write shit about what "Trump supporters" are, and I just can't anymore. I didn't vote for Trump the first two times, but never once did I hate or vilify anyone who did. Turning people against each other was the easiest thing ever. It's frightening.
This hits home! I agree with everything you said and yes, I am guilty of having pathological 90's nostalgia and romanticizing that time, especially culturally. I mean, damn, I was a freshman in high school when Kurt Cobain killed himself, and I still remember what I was wearing when I heard the news. It don't get more "90's" than that! But you're right, it was the illusion of stability against the backdrop of an adolescent/early adulthood awakening and self-discovery. Sure, there were some things (many things, even) that were better but all the foundations of where we are now were already in place then. Afterall, the whole "politically correct" movement, one could easily argue that was basically Woke 1.0
My Boyfriend and I recently watched the movie PCU (1994) and even though it's an over-the-top college comedy, everything they mock in that movie became our reality, which again means the stage was set then. I think the biggest difference between then and now is that the political apparatus hadn't seized upon the culture and merged itself with it for their own ends yet. Going back to the 90's of course is an impossibility and yet even if we could, the sad reality is that all we'd really be doing is rolling the car back up the hill only to slide down to where we ended up yet again. So, forward is the only option. And while it's nice and even maybe necessary to allow myself a temporary lull back into 90s fantasy while listening to Smashing Pumpkins while doing errands (lamenting the youth music of today) or watching 90's TV shows like 90210 or ER.... it is just that, relics from a beloved past, a fantasy.
Thanks for the shoutout, Josh! I’m glad it’s helped you with gaining a new perspective. That’s really what I try to write about on Substack, regardless of the topic.
Yes, people are miswanting their special days and months and celebrations. Having pride celebrations practically non-stop the last few years (in particular) really only made a certain group of people much more visible and thus hated. People don’t like having things shoved down their throats against their will.
Who wants to be hated? Who wants to show up in a place where they are not valued? That’s something that only people who (internally) hate themselves do. If you truly loved yourself then you would want to show up in places with people who value and appreciate you. You’d be more selective in where you go.
People who want to be very visible, like having a month-long celebration and being forced upon resistant people in school, media (news & streaming specials), and political celebrations, must not like themselves very much. These actions lead others to hate you. Forcing yourself upon others engenders hatred.
Just being a good person in the world (without force) is what allows people to love you. Some people go about this poorly because they don’t really think things through. It’s time to gain a new perspective!
Thank you for this,Josh. I came of age during the late 60’s and early 70’s and mostly lived out my lefty-lawyer dreams. But I’m more than ready for the new paradigm. And, frankly, they (the old “we”) did go too far. But like Linus, the old crew still wants the safety blanket that assures them everything they want, no matter how ridiculous, is theirs for the taking: Codify it! I’m happy to say good-bye to the 90’s.
I sometimes miss the '90s. The feeling of the Cold War being over. At Christmas I miss the malls full of people and things to buy, now you would nevee know it's Christmas. But I also feel sick because all this liberal claptrap has led to such horribje results.
I was opposed to all of it, even though I was gaym I told my therapist that everything was going too fast. People need time to adjust to change it happens over a generation not months or years. I also expressed concern that there would be a backlash. The day would come, tables would turn and the backlash would be severe.
We have been psychologically abused and oppressed for so long it will be nearly impossible to convince some people that dismantling Black History Month and Pride Season and all the other "special days" does not mean a return to overt racism and homophobia, etc.
A lot of the same thoughts are drifting through the ether...
My therapist & I recently had a fantasy session of how far back everything should be rolled back to. I said 1998, she 2000 - it was basically the peak of Western civilization when everything was basically fixed and the bright internet boom looked like fixing up another postwar economic boom for the mainstream. Cool Brittania ruled the air-waves.
This is on the money: "U.S.-Civil Rights-Baby Boomer-Late-20th-Century-derived privileges"
I resent the Baby Boomers, my parents' generation. They are getting old, yet they maintain an iron grip on culture. As a group the boomers are entitled, greedy bullies who think it's 1990. They expect to be in charge forever.
Letting go of the boomer ethos requires the 65+ crowd to get out of the way. As long as they are allowed to lie atop their heap of treasure unchallenged, the boomer dragons will not let anyone move into the future.
Yep. I see a lot of what I think is unjustified demonization of baby boomers by really young people (for anyone 35 and under, anyone one day older than them is "a boomer").
But I also see how locked down we have been by this incredibly narcissistic, spoiled generation. There's a reason the 70s were called the "me" decade-that's baby boomers.
They remade the world in their own image so successfully that even those of us outside that cohort think it's "normal." It's not. It's an outlier in history, and they really have been way above their station for, well, forever.
Most of this holding onto the past is fantasizing about their glory days when they got to think of themselves as Freedom Fighters and Bra Burners and Desegregators.
I was at the end of the baby boomers and in diapers so I had no say or knowledge in what was going on, except barely remembering hearing the President was shot. In 1967 (age 7) I heard the word "cancer" in hushed tones and Grandpa had it. He went to the hospital for surgery and never came out. I remember waving to him outside through the window before his surgery. I even made a drawing of that (I still have). Because he died on St. Patrick's day, I made a card and drawing for him that I was never able to give him. My sister (5) and I could not go to his funeral as I guess the adults felt it would be too traumatic for little children. Jumping ahead to narcissists - there is a new documentary by David Farrier (Tickled) called Mister Organ. I just watched it on Netflix. The Creative Director of Museum of Home Video, Bret Berg, had Farrier on the show and Bret mentioned that we should watch the entire documentary so that we can identify the narcissists and sociopaths in our own lives. The trailer doesn't give away much but this was one scary guy. Curious if anyone else here has seen it or how it compares to others experiences with narcissists.
The way I see the boomers is as a generation who ate up 3-generations' worth of resources - the boon selflessly left for them by the preceding great-gen, the product of their own works; and they figured out how to mortgage and cash in on the wealth the following gen would otherwise enjoy - except they tricked out the economy so the boomers would siphon it off for themselves...
The part that appealed to me of the 90’s that we got right in a grassroots level was race. When it got dredged up again 10 years later into hysteria it felt artificial.
But yeah a lot of it (androgeny) and etc lent its way right into woke. It was “neo-woke” by then and we had no idea that beast that was forming in the institutions. The nihilism of grunge (even tho I still love Kurt Cobain) set the stage.
We had the race thing correct (and the gay thing) but we didn’t see what was brewing behind the scenes of the “tolerance” campaign. If it had just been left alone at the grassroots level it would have been fine. We were good on our own this way and did not push back when it started to become political. So we GenX have our part to play in the blame game.
The worst formulation to come out of the Universal Liberal Agreement has been the bigot/ally binary.
For so many issues, there have been only two positions recognized: you are either an ally of The Poor Oppressed Minority or you are a hardcore biggit.
I remember how in the late 60s/through the 70s, there was a lot of wrangling about welfare, and any time the GOP raised an objection to the program, they were stridently accused of bigotry.
And that was the end of the discussion. Nobody could discuss whether welfare was helping or harming the recipients, no one could suggest that maybe this or that aspect needed changing -- no, no! Anyone who raised a question was OBVIOUSLY motivated by racism, and there's no need to discuss anything with racists.
If we can truly retire that binary from public legitimacy, if everyone can recognize that there are multiple sides to an issue, and that bigotry is rarely the motivation behind an opinion, that will be such a relief!
Ok, we won't get perfectly harmonious public discussion -- too many Cluster Bs with microphones -- but it would do my soul good to see YER A BIGGIT taken off the table.
Josh, your honesty is bracingly fresh.. not unlike accidentally inhaling the mouthwash one was gargling with! Thank you for saying what must be said to break the spell. Always deeply appreciated and immensely enjoyed.
Really hope this woke nonsense and all the associated nonsense is finally dead. Also hope it means decent writers and artists can get their due at long last.
A lot has been driven by non profits. Once we get “equality” then no need for HRC, NAACP, etc. These organizations have become one big grift and the grifters need to keep the grift going. This includes “celebrities” that tag along for the grift.
The problem is we never learned the lesson taught to us as children. Not everyone is going to love you. In fact, most people won’t even like you. It’s not complicated. And nothing you can do will change that. Oh, you think there is. But you’re merely swapping deck chairs. People will like you, love you, dislike you and hate you, for reasons you have no control over. The big issue is we don’t foster a sense of community, we drive people away, off their land, out of their neighborhoods, evict them. Our culture is a petridish of social alienation and sociopathy. Why would we expect our leaders to be any different? If you make one friend out all of that, don’t expect them to agree with everything you say or accept everything about you, just be grateful they’re your friend. Besides, who gives a fuck what someone says behind your back they don’t have the guts to say to your face? It’s not complicated. Want a friend? Then be a friend.
This is a powerful post, because it's coming from someone who could, but won't play the victim. Kudos!
I went to college in the 90’s and was indoctrinated with all the garbage we are dealing with now. It was a thing then, wasn’t useful then and I agree with you, it all needs to go now. Not just less extreme, but gone. It didn’t work. Once I saw it at the extreme level, I learned just like you that all of it is garbage. I wish all of it would go away. Maybe someday.
The reason it doesn't work is because it's being forced upon people. I wrote about that a bit in another comment. The only way to get people to love you is to just be a kind person and not force things upon others. These people, with these month-long celebrations are into forcing hearing about this (and seeing it everywhere, like Amazon's recommended reading/watching lists), and forcing things upon resistant people just makes them hate you. It's the total opposite of what the intention supposedly was for these special time periods. It was never going to work.
The flags arrayed all over public spaces have the air of a conquering army planting its standard on newly won territory, and you know what? That's why they adopted flags: to claim territory. To let us know we'd been conquered.
Very similar to the de-segregating of schools. They were already going towards that, but then it was FORCED onto whites & blacks, at gun point.
You had me at: "Scads of women are worried that they won’t have the “misogyny” excuse anymore for just about everything from their job disappointments to men talking back and telling them they’re being too selfish and emotional, for example."
I have to admit I'm encouraging men as best as I can to not take this anymore, or push back if they're afraid to. That said you might imagine I know many men who could push back but don't either because they don't want to deal with it or because they are afraid of reputation damage. I get it. But it does become exhausting to stand alone. I see what you see as the default ideology among women, and idk why people are saying wokeism is in the dustbin. If anything, this zombie ideology has been turbocharged because of trump. And this is one of the very few places that I will admit that I wanted Trump to win because I want eros to recede somewhat from the public sphere, or at least stop dominating it. But, I also didn't want it because I knew people around me would be hysterical.
This also reminded me of Harrington's book. She makes a compelling argument against progress and definitely has me convinced. I never thought I'd say that.
Progressives confused "progress" with the directed abolishment of all normativity. I read MH but I think she mislabelled the term "reactionary" feminism. Its not reactionary - its just returning to base socio-psychological norms of men & women coupling up in pairs for life to reproduce. Something so deeply ingrained into the species that all it took was one generation breaking away from this to potentially derail Western culture.
Of course the left will double down! We already know that's how they operate. But it will be enjoyable watching their tantrums.
I feel the same. I go on FB and people I've been friends with for 40 years write shit about what "Trump supporters" are, and I just can't anymore. I didn't vote for Trump the first two times, but never once did I hate or vilify anyone who did. Turning people against each other was the easiest thing ever. It's frightening.
This hits home! I agree with everything you said and yes, I am guilty of having pathological 90's nostalgia and romanticizing that time, especially culturally. I mean, damn, I was a freshman in high school when Kurt Cobain killed himself, and I still remember what I was wearing when I heard the news. It don't get more "90's" than that! But you're right, it was the illusion of stability against the backdrop of an adolescent/early adulthood awakening and self-discovery. Sure, there were some things (many things, even) that were better but all the foundations of where we are now were already in place then. Afterall, the whole "politically correct" movement, one could easily argue that was basically Woke 1.0
My Boyfriend and I recently watched the movie PCU (1994) and even though it's an over-the-top college comedy, everything they mock in that movie became our reality, which again means the stage was set then. I think the biggest difference between then and now is that the political apparatus hadn't seized upon the culture and merged itself with it for their own ends yet. Going back to the 90's of course is an impossibility and yet even if we could, the sad reality is that all we'd really be doing is rolling the car back up the hill only to slide down to where we ended up yet again. So, forward is the only option. And while it's nice and even maybe necessary to allow myself a temporary lull back into 90s fantasy while listening to Smashing Pumpkins while doing errands (lamenting the youth music of today) or watching 90's TV shows like 90210 or ER.... it is just that, relics from a beloved past, a fantasy.
Thanks for the shoutout, Josh! I’m glad it’s helped you with gaining a new perspective. That’s really what I try to write about on Substack, regardless of the topic.
Yes, people are miswanting their special days and months and celebrations. Having pride celebrations practically non-stop the last few years (in particular) really only made a certain group of people much more visible and thus hated. People don’t like having things shoved down their throats against their will.
Who wants to be hated? Who wants to show up in a place where they are not valued? That’s something that only people who (internally) hate themselves do. If you truly loved yourself then you would want to show up in places with people who value and appreciate you. You’d be more selective in where you go.
People who want to be very visible, like having a month-long celebration and being forced upon resistant people in school, media (news & streaming specials), and political celebrations, must not like themselves very much. These actions lead others to hate you. Forcing yourself upon others engenders hatred.
Just being a good person in the world (without force) is what allows people to love you. Some people go about this poorly because they don’t really think things through. It’s time to gain a new perspective!
Thank you for this,Josh. I came of age during the late 60’s and early 70’s and mostly lived out my lefty-lawyer dreams. But I’m more than ready for the new paradigm. And, frankly, they (the old “we”) did go too far. But like Linus, the old crew still wants the safety blanket that assures them everything they want, no matter how ridiculous, is theirs for the taking: Codify it! I’m happy to say good-bye to the 90’s.
I sometimes miss the '90s. The feeling of the Cold War being over. At Christmas I miss the malls full of people and things to buy, now you would nevee know it's Christmas. But I also feel sick because all this liberal claptrap has led to such horribje results.
I was opposed to all of it, even though I was gaym I told my therapist that everything was going too fast. People need time to adjust to change it happens over a generation not months or years. I also expressed concern that there would be a backlash. The day would come, tables would turn and the backlash would be severe.
That day has finally come.
We have been psychologically abused and oppressed for so long it will be nearly impossible to convince some people that dismantling Black History Month and Pride Season and all the other "special days" does not mean a return to overt racism and homophobia, etc.
A lot of the same thoughts are drifting through the ether...
My therapist & I recently had a fantasy session of how far back everything should be rolled back to. I said 1998, she 2000 - it was basically the peak of Western civilization when everything was basically fixed and the bright internet boom looked like fixing up another postwar economic boom for the mainstream. Cool Brittania ruled the air-waves.
What if the real answer is more like 1898. I guess we'll never know.
This is on the money: "U.S.-Civil Rights-Baby Boomer-Late-20th-Century-derived privileges"
I resent the Baby Boomers, my parents' generation. They are getting old, yet they maintain an iron grip on culture. As a group the boomers are entitled, greedy bullies who think it's 1990. They expect to be in charge forever.
Letting go of the boomer ethos requires the 65+ crowd to get out of the way. As long as they are allowed to lie atop their heap of treasure unchallenged, the boomer dragons will not let anyone move into the future.
Yep. I see a lot of what I think is unjustified demonization of baby boomers by really young people (for anyone 35 and under, anyone one day older than them is "a boomer").
But I also see how locked down we have been by this incredibly narcissistic, spoiled generation. There's a reason the 70s were called the "me" decade-that's baby boomers.
They remade the world in their own image so successfully that even those of us outside that cohort think it's "normal." It's not. It's an outlier in history, and they really have been way above their station for, well, forever.
Most of this holding onto the past is fantasizing about their glory days when they got to think of themselves as Freedom Fighters and Bra Burners and Desegregators.
Fighting "the man" indeed. They are the man.
I was at the end of the baby boomers and in diapers so I had no say or knowledge in what was going on, except barely remembering hearing the President was shot. In 1967 (age 7) I heard the word "cancer" in hushed tones and Grandpa had it. He went to the hospital for surgery and never came out. I remember waving to him outside through the window before his surgery. I even made a drawing of that (I still have). Because he died on St. Patrick's day, I made a card and drawing for him that I was never able to give him. My sister (5) and I could not go to his funeral as I guess the adults felt it would be too traumatic for little children. Jumping ahead to narcissists - there is a new documentary by David Farrier (Tickled) called Mister Organ. I just watched it on Netflix. The Creative Director of Museum of Home Video, Bret Berg, had Farrier on the show and Bret mentioned that we should watch the entire documentary so that we can identify the narcissists and sociopaths in our own lives. The trailer doesn't give away much but this was one scary guy. Curious if anyone else here has seen it or how it compares to others experiences with narcissists.
The way I see the boomers is as a generation who ate up 3-generations' worth of resources - the boon selflessly left for them by the preceding great-gen, the product of their own works; and they figured out how to mortgage and cash in on the wealth the following gen would otherwise enjoy - except they tricked out the economy so the boomers would siphon it off for themselves...
The part that appealed to me of the 90’s that we got right in a grassroots level was race. When it got dredged up again 10 years later into hysteria it felt artificial.
But yeah a lot of it (androgeny) and etc lent its way right into woke. It was “neo-woke” by then and we had no idea that beast that was forming in the institutions. The nihilism of grunge (even tho I still love Kurt Cobain) set the stage.
Yeah. There really was none of this race obsession; the race of your friends really didn't cross your mind very much at all. We went so backward.
We had the race thing correct (and the gay thing) but we didn’t see what was brewing behind the scenes of the “tolerance” campaign. If it had just been left alone at the grassroots level it would have been fine. We were good on our own this way and did not push back when it started to become political. So we GenX have our part to play in the blame game.
The worst formulation to come out of the Universal Liberal Agreement has been the bigot/ally binary.
For so many issues, there have been only two positions recognized: you are either an ally of The Poor Oppressed Minority or you are a hardcore biggit.
I remember how in the late 60s/through the 70s, there was a lot of wrangling about welfare, and any time the GOP raised an objection to the program, they were stridently accused of bigotry.
And that was the end of the discussion. Nobody could discuss whether welfare was helping or harming the recipients, no one could suggest that maybe this or that aspect needed changing -- no, no! Anyone who raised a question was OBVIOUSLY motivated by racism, and there's no need to discuss anything with racists.
If we can truly retire that binary from public legitimacy, if everyone can recognize that there are multiple sides to an issue, and that bigotry is rarely the motivation behind an opinion, that will be such a relief!
Ok, we won't get perfectly harmonious public discussion -- too many Cluster Bs with microphones -- but it would do my soul good to see YER A BIGGIT taken off the table.
Josh, your honesty is bracingly fresh.. not unlike accidentally inhaling the mouthwash one was gargling with! Thank you for saying what must be said to break the spell. Always deeply appreciated and immensely enjoyed.
Really hope this woke nonsense and all the associated nonsense is finally dead. Also hope it means decent writers and artists can get their due at long last.
A lot has been driven by non profits. Once we get “equality” then no need for HRC, NAACP, etc. These organizations have become one big grift and the grifters need to keep the grift going. This includes “celebrities” that tag along for the grift.
The problem is we never learned the lesson taught to us as children. Not everyone is going to love you. In fact, most people won’t even like you. It’s not complicated. And nothing you can do will change that. Oh, you think there is. But you’re merely swapping deck chairs. People will like you, love you, dislike you and hate you, for reasons you have no control over. The big issue is we don’t foster a sense of community, we drive people away, off their land, out of their neighborhoods, evict them. Our culture is a petridish of social alienation and sociopathy. Why would we expect our leaders to be any different? If you make one friend out all of that, don’t expect them to agree with everything you say or accept everything about you, just be grateful they’re your friend. Besides, who gives a fuck what someone says behind your back they don’t have the guts to say to your face? It’s not complicated. Want a friend? Then be a friend.