I’m done with modern telephony. I’m not taking phone calls that I have to strain to understand because you want to use blue tooth headphones, or you want to use speaker phone, or you want to use Whatever Newest Device is Convenient For the Caller With No Thought To Whether The Callee Can Hear You.
It’s more that I’m done with the lack of consideration that modern people show. Telephone call technology has devolved (there was no such thing as “can you hear me now” with landlines). But so have our manners.
As I write this, I’m irked that many readers are going to perceive me as being bitchy or asking for “too much.”
No.
I’m not asking for too much. I’m asking for the same courtesy that you also agreed was normal 10 years ago. The same courtesy I give people that I call, and I do. Unfailingly.
Here are the rules if you call me. They should be the same rules you use when you call anyone:
1. Identify yourself if you are not someone I speak to often enough that I have you listed in my phone contacts.
Do not say, “Is Josh there?”
Who taught you to do this? When did you forget that it’s your responsibility—-since you’re impinging on my phone and asking for my time—to identify yourself first?
If you say “Is Josh there?” without saying, “Hi, this is Joe Smith,” I will hang up on you. Rude.
2. Ask your conversational partner if he minds if you use speaker phone.
Why?
a. I may not want my words to be broadcast into a room full of people I may not know. Duh? Rude.
b. Speaker phone degrades clarity and volume. It makes it harder to hear. If I have to do more than one “I can’t hear you,” I hang up on you. Be willing to be audible or we don’t talk.
3. Ask your conversational partner if he can hear you well after you plug in your favorite convenient ear device. Don’t you care about whether the person you’re calling can hear you? I think you do. So think of this first.
It’s not “people’s ways of communicating change, it’s natural.” No.
It’s that basic, universal, timeless consideration for other people (manners) have gone out of fashion. Not just for “mean people,” for everyone. People I like and love.
Bring them back or we don’t talk. I insist on the same level of courtesy and respect given to me as I give to everyone I call and speak to.
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You know who is the only person I know who uses actual phone manners? Holly. I think it's because she has experience being the "callee" and is hard of hearing and uses hearing aids.
It shouldn't take having that personal experience for other people to use basic, reasonable courtesy like they used to.
Thank you Josh.
Basic telephone etiquette matters, especially today where it’s so lacking. It makes is easier for you to stand out among the rest too.
I’m a bit hard of hearing so any increase in call quality that’s in control of either party is vital.
On handsets, occasionally taking some rubbing alcohol and a cotton swab to clean sweat, grit, make up, etc. can go a long way in increasing microphone and speaker quality.
For voicemails, especially cold calls or when the recipient likely doesn’t have your number stored, state your name and full number at both the beginning but restate them at the end. Keep them short too.
“Good morning, my name is X at 555-555-5555. I’m wishing to speak with Y about Z. Again my name is X and I can be reached at 555-555-5555. Thank you and have a good day.”