Guest post: Goblins of Long Island

other people see it, too

This is a guest post by commenter Chappy Tee, riffing on yesterday’s post.

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I live in Long Island City, NY and it has become even more bizarre lately. Today at the market I ran into a lesbian couple that was one part gigantic whore goblin and one part skinny trans goblin with a shaved head (except for a little ponytail growing out the top), neck and finger tattoos, wallet on a keychain, and work boots. Very concerning was that she only looked about 17, while the biggun seemed 30-40ish. I thought it might be a mother and daughter until I heard their terms of endearment as they contemplated various meal options involving noodles and chili. I became so anxious.

On the walk home in a steady rain, I saw a teenager walking towards me in S/M gear: a leather thong, studded bustier, thigh high boots, and tarantula eyelashes. She passed multiple people, but the only ones who noticed were the delivery men that ogled. I remember thinking that today was a doozy and I better get home right away, but it would become even more surreal.

As I reached my block and turned towards my building, a pregnant woman walked past me and into Chase bank. She was in her 20’s and wearing an old beige bra, saggy yellow panties with her very pregnant belly hanging over, and jelly slippers on her stained feet. Even though it was raining and I had my arms full, I stopped and watched the bank entrance. Surely she would be escorted out of the bank, right? Perhaps 311 might be called and a mental health response team deployed. But nothing happened. I felt dissociated, I think. A sort of cultural derealization. I remember looking around to see if anyone else was shocked, but no one was. I often feel like I’m screaming into a void when I try to explain things to people, but I had that same sensation without saying a word.

The world has gone mad and no one around me seems to notice. I feel like I’m a character in a dystopian novel that doesn’t have a happy ending.