“James Lindsay is own worst enemy. His message can’t be heard because he’s so obnoxious!”
”People would listen to you more if you weren’t so angry. I’m only trying to help you spread your message!”
”You catch more flies with honey than vinegar!”
1. No, he isn’t. Your tender sensibilities, and your schoolmarm orientation to the world, are misleading you.
You, personally, don’t like plain spoken men. Too bad. Your personal emotions have nothing to do with anyone else’s effectiveness in the real world.
2. No, they wouldn’t. People do not listen to any ideas they are emotionally resistant to. You, personally, want to elevate your personal approach to be synonymous with “what effective and good people do.”
It’s incredibly narcissistic. And wrong.
You’re also lying about wanting to help me spread my message (a typical type of lie from scolding women). You’re trying to control the way I speak. I know your type, “Caitlin”.
And I don’t care if you don’t like my anger.
3. I’m not trying to catch flies, and I am not in need of your counsel.
You’re welcome for the brave work that men like James Lindsay do, because you are too cowardly and passive aggressive to do so yourself. You’re also welcome for the work I do, that serves purposes that you personally want to see accomplished.
I note that you’ve done nothing of substance, that you are a coward who will not tell the truth under your own name, and that you get your jollies being a Brenda from HR.
You’re not anyone’s manager.
PS—Kiss my ass.
Big PPS---
Here are the rules in my spaces. They are directions.
They are not "requests."
You do not get to "disagree" with them. You don't get to disagree with your host's rule that you remove your shoes before entering his house. This is the same.
1. Your dislike of my tone, manner, or subject matter will not be entertained. Not even once.
If you do this you are banned from commenting here. I don't care that you paid me. Cancel your subscription. I will not refund you anything you've paid in the past.
2. I do not tolerate maternal or parental tone or critique. Never speak to me as you were my teacher, my counselor, or my parent.
3. My anger is not on the table for your dissection. Ever. Do it once and you'll never speak to me again.
Most importantly, do not do this: "You're just so insecure that you can't handle disagreement."
Disagreement is fine. Maternal monitoring and tone policing are not.
These two things---disagreement/maternal monitoring---are entirely different things.
I know that you know they are different things. So if I catch you doing the "you just don't want disagreement" I am going to judge you to be a covert, passive aggressive manipulator. You will be banned.
**whistling, fist-pumping, applauding until my hands hurt, then applauding some more**